Another week has passed....
Last time I wrote I talked mainly about the wonders of the shower, and
how I rediscovered the little things in life, those we have forgotten
already how they do us good, and we took them for granted. Because
that's life. We forget. Too fast. And a lot too.
This week, my appetite returned, and I managed to eat quite a bit, knowing that I prepare myself for the next battle in the war - chemo # 2. It might be easier, maybe not. No one can guarantee anything, and honestly, I do not ask or try to know too much. Because it's still important in the process - take each day as a separate unit, rather than trying to guess and imagine what would happen in a month. Or in a week. This planning, in some ways, lost its relevance as soon as I was told I am sick.
This week, as expected, the hair started falling out, and I decided that since it does not really matter, and I do not really control, it's time to get a haircut ... And I did ... My hair designer for 12 years, Amir Bakshi, came to the hospital last Thursday night, equipped with lot of optimism and love, and slowly lowered the mane of hair that I had. Honestly, almost everyone who met me said that the new haircut even more flattering than the last .. I want to believe they told the whole truth .... To remove any doubt of how I look now, and for those who have not visited yet, I am enclosing a picture of my new look, courtesy of Amir ...
This week I met a new friend in the department. He arrived here after passing nightmare of Israeli Kupat Cholim (HMO). Liver and bone metastases. And the source? Not known. During the day I discovered another two young patients, in their 30s. They also discovered a sudden illness. They, like me, had pain or another, but a health system which had never considered such a disease in their bodies. And so they came here. Unexpectedly. Just like me. Almost at the same time as me. And each of us was told the same sentence - the cancer has spread quickly in the body. Meetings with them this week brought me slowly discover this world of cancer patients, and those whose world had collapsed in one moment - the families.
Sometimes we underestimate what is happening to the patient’s relatives, since there is no doubt that the confrontation of the patients themselves is very difficult. Within each vortex of chemotherapy, tests, injections, blood counts, fluids, drips and what not, we forget the other heroes, those who struggle behind the scenes. Those who do not sleep as well, due to their concern and endless love. Parents and siblings. I am realizing everyday how much influence has one disease, unimaginably wide, and the frustration of not being able to help and ease the pain of those they love the most, no less feeling of nausea and vomiting.
This week, my appetite returned, and I managed to eat quite a bit, knowing that I prepare myself for the next battle in the war - chemo # 2. It might be easier, maybe not. No one can guarantee anything, and honestly, I do not ask or try to know too much. Because it's still important in the process - take each day as a separate unit, rather than trying to guess and imagine what would happen in a month. Or in a week. This planning, in some ways, lost its relevance as soon as I was told I am sick.
This week, as expected, the hair started falling out, and I decided that since it does not really matter, and I do not really control, it's time to get a haircut ... And I did ... My hair designer for 12 years, Amir Bakshi, came to the hospital last Thursday night, equipped with lot of optimism and love, and slowly lowered the mane of hair that I had. Honestly, almost everyone who met me said that the new haircut even more flattering than the last .. I want to believe they told the whole truth .... To remove any doubt of how I look now, and for those who have not visited yet, I am enclosing a picture of my new look, courtesy of Amir ...
This week I met a new friend in the department. He arrived here after passing nightmare of Israeli Kupat Cholim (HMO). Liver and bone metastases. And the source? Not known. During the day I discovered another two young patients, in their 30s. They also discovered a sudden illness. They, like me, had pain or another, but a health system which had never considered such a disease in their bodies. And so they came here. Unexpectedly. Just like me. Almost at the same time as me. And each of us was told the same sentence - the cancer has spread quickly in the body. Meetings with them this week brought me slowly discover this world of cancer patients, and those whose world had collapsed in one moment - the families.
Sometimes we underestimate what is happening to the patient’s relatives, since there is no doubt that the confrontation of the patients themselves is very difficult. Within each vortex of chemotherapy, tests, injections, blood counts, fluids, drips and what not, we forget the other heroes, those who struggle behind the scenes. Those who do not sleep as well, due to their concern and endless love. Parents and siblings. I am realizing everyday how much influence has one disease, unimaginably wide, and the frustration of not being able to help and ease the pain of those they love the most, no less feeling of nausea and vomiting.
This
week, after recovering somewhat from the effects of chemotherapy, I
talked with some of the patients in the department. Everyone, and anyone
who reads the words, I have one main message to deliver – the struggle
is daily and therefore each day is its own unit. That's why, every day
one have to choose one small victory, the one we will go to sleep at
night. And this victory, is the knowledge, that I, little by little,
will create separate statistics myself and win the cancer. Every day,
one small victory. We do not know what the day will bring, and we're not
sure what will happen next week. We do know, those small victories,
whether in taking a shower, or a day with no appetite and vomiting, are
the ones that will bring us, mentally, to the victory. After all, we
already know the sentence - "who dares wins only". And daring to do
something new, a small victory, is the one that will foster us to the
next battle.
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